Bismillah dan Salam.
Sampai-sampai je ofis terasa mcm nak menulis sesuatu. Close eyes and take a deep breath whisper: "friend". Well I have this one friend that helped me so much in my everyday life since I've started working. Yes I'm working at the same place where I did my industrial study. Let me story a little bit about this person.
During the whole practical period, I've rented an apartment near to the office. Senang nak pegi kerja.
Sebab dekat.Tapi lepas habis je practical, aku pindah balik rumah family. Tapi jauh nun dari ofis. Tak kisahla,asal dekat dengan family. But the worse thing is i got no one can send me to work. My father and my brother couldnt do that. So, no choice, i had to go to work using public transport.
But things became very sad cause i have no idea how to get on those public transportation. Nak naik dari mana,nak turun kat mana,pastu nak buat apa,nak naik bas no brapa..dem!..i totally have no idea bout that. But then "this friend" of mine helped me searching all the answer for my question above. "this friend" of mine also had spent some time bring me and teach me how to use those public transport. Alhamdulillah berkat pertolongan dia, aku dh boleh berdikari. And the great thing about this is,it makes me loved to go to work. :)
There are lot of things that "this friend" of mine helped me. How glad and thankful i am to have this kind of friend. Beruntung sangat. Terlalu banyak utk diceritakan kat sini apa yang die dh lakukan. Dia tahu bila aku resah. Dia tahu bile aku rasa takut. Dia tahu bila aku dalam kesusahan. Dia tahu dan dia selalu cuba untuk tolong aku. In every way.
But this one fine day. We've been talking about something yang lebih menjurus kepada diri aku. And I know somehow apa yang die cakap tu utk kebaikan aku. Ya. Memang utk kebaikan aku. Untuk improve kan lagi diri aku ke arah yang lebih baik. To be a better person. But,truly it hurts me. sapa yang xkecil hati bila org ckp mcm tu kat kita. Say something yang you know, hurting you. Aku terima teguran dia,yela sbb aku yang gatal pi tanya. Pastu nak kecik hati pulak kan. ha..padan la muka aku.
But my feeling is keep changing everyday since dia tegur aku. Mula2 tu aku boleh terima dan ok aku nak berubah. Tapi lama2 i feel like 'this is me..tak berdaya nak ubah hanya kerana nak puaskan hati org lain' kind of feeling. So ive made a decision that in order to appreciate what "this friend of mine" have done to me,
i will no longer rely on "this friend of mine" anymore. Its not a bad thing. Please dun get me wrong. Ini la jalan terbaik utk aku tidak melukakan hati dia yang dh banyak tolong aku. Aku akan cuba sedaya upaya utk tidak kelihatan xelok depan dia. you know. Behave.
So,the conclusion is, aku beruntung sgt dapat kawan mcm dia. Syukur sgt. :)
Tapi aku takut, in fact aku tau yang aku ni bukan kawan die yang menyenangkan die,kawan yang boleh buat die berterima kasih,kawan yang boleh anything la yang buat die bersyukur ke apa ke. i know, im not that kind of person. Because im not going to change for other person's sake. you know. berubah untuk senang kan hati orang lain. sedangkan hati kita sendiri tak mampu nak buat perubahan tu.So xda gunanya. Mungkin orang kata sikap aku ni ego. Tapi fikirla,lebih baik ego dari hati tu x ikhlas. i will change. someday. But i changed for of my own sake. Not others. tapi tak bermaksud aku xboleh ditegur..Boleh..apa plak tak boleh..hehe.. :) Anyway,rasa syukur tu masih ada. Rasa sayang kekal di hati..
